a story of grace

When I was 7 years old, I had a nightmare I'll never forget. I woke up sweating and shaking. I can still remember the feeling of uncertainty that pulled me into a deep sense of fear. The nightmare I had woken up from involved two close relatives of our family who had both passed on; one just after I was born, the other only a few months ago. To the best of my knowledge, neither of them had known Christ. In my dream, these two relatives were pleading with me to be ready and know where I would spend my eternity. I was so frightened by this. Death in any form had always scared me, so I'd never put much thought into my own future death. It was that night I realized that someday, for sure and certain, I was going to die. I knew where I wanted to go, but deep inside I knew I wouldn't get there.
Ever since I can remember, my parents have been faithful to teach me and my siblings about Christ and what He did on the cross. I knew about God. I knew Jesus died for people's sins. I knew it, but I had yet to come to understand it. It wasn't alive in my heart; I didn't believe.
Sitting there in my bed I was fearing death, yearning for hope and aching within my soul for certainty. I saw my need for Christ. I was a sinner in need of His grace. God then brought to my mind Acts 16:31 which says, "Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and you shall be saved." In Acts 16, Paul was taking to the jailer who wanted to be saved. Those words meant the same thing that night in my bed as they did to the jailer so long ago. Jesus opened my eyes that night and saved me. I had found what I was searching for all along, wether I'd known I was searching or not. The Lord didn't have to reveal Himself to me...I didn't (and still don't) deserve salvation, but He chose to grant it to me.
Ever since He adopted me into His family 9 years ago, He has always, always been by my side loving me, teaching me, guiding me and being a faithful and gracious Savior. I want to live my life to honor Him. He is beautiful. He is my everything. I love Him and strive to love Him more everyday in word, deed and heart. Psalm 34:8

P.S. Dear people, I know I promised you guys more pictures of our trip and I will post those, but it's just been on my heart to write out my testimony. Thanks for taking the time to read it; I hope it wasn't too painful for you. I know I'm not the best writer, as I've mentioned before...*cringes*. Haha ;)

1 comment:

Rissi said...

Well said, Maria. I (vaguely) remember being freaked out at the concept of losing (death) those I loved as a child. You do have to live smartly but you have to live also. That is my outlook on life but yet as you say, you have to be prepared because He doesn't promise tomorrow.